So I’m driving along with my three girls and my niece as we come upon some cows. Chloe quickly points to a cow and then this conversation happens…
Chloe: “I named that cow Melissa.”
Lydia: “Which cow?”
Chloe: “The one with the white face.”
Sofia: “Did you name any of the other cows?”
Chloe: “Just Melissa with the white face.”
Vivian: “You should have named her Mooo-lissa so she could understand you.”
I am never bored with these girls!
My middle daughter still has a few issues with masks and costumes, but she’s getting better and agreed to a Disney cruise. Her sisters are beyond excited and my husband is not the least bit on board with this idea. I know we’re going to be throwing our money at all things Princess, so I informed the girls they need to start a Disney Cruise fund.
It’s really just a way to tell them no when they ask for things and be able to remind them of their trip without being the super cheap mom that always says ‘no’. So far, they are cooperating and even asking for chores to earn money. That’s right, chores, Box Tops, loose change, any way to earn money…and I mean any way.
The other day I asked my youngest, my baby, my mini me for a hug. She put down her change cup, smiled ever so sweetly, and gave me the tightest hug as she told me how much she loves me. She then stood up and said, “I’m gonna need some cash money for that hug. I’m trying to earn money for my Disney fund.” I told her I didn’t have any change and she said, “Mom, I said cash money. Dollar bills, no change. I’m trying to go on a Disney Cruise here.”
I tried to explain to Vivian that she would be wearing a cap and gown for her Kindergarten graduation picture, but she got super excited about her cute outfit and even picked a hair bow. I explained that a cap is a kind of hat and she might need to take out her hair bow. She looked at me and said, “Nope. I look good today and I am not messing up this hair with some stinking’ hat!”
When we got to the school, I thought her teachers might be able to talk her into it. Not so much. Thank goodness one of the teachers recommended that she hold the cap in her picture. After a lot of sass and attitude, she agreed to hold the cap.
After our picture day drama, I knew graduation day would be an issue with “that stinkin’ hat” so, in true mom fashion, I decided to lie. “You know, Viv, you can’t go on to first grade if you don’t wear the hat to graduation. It’s one of the rules.” She rolled her eyes and said, “Are you kidding me? I don’t want to be in kindergarten again! I’ll wear the stupid hat, but just this time.”
When all the kids walked in, she was wearing her little cap and gown, smiling her goofy 
embarrassed smile in front of all the families. She sat down and giggled nervously as I quietly rejoiced in one of my few victories with her. Awards were presented and a little kid bumped her hat as he walked by, then another classmate bumped her hat. She took off the hat and put it under her seat. I got her attention and motioned to put her cap back on, but she looked at me and whispered, “My teacher said to put our hats under our seats if they fall off.” with that ‘get ya some of that’ look and she quickly turned around.
She received awards for her test scores, the library award, her diploma, and ‘Most Likely to be a Fashion Designer’. Well played, Kindergarten Teachers, well played.
As I was trying to get the girls ready for dance carpool and myself ready for CrossFit, I walked in to find Vivian drawing…completely naked. Rushing around, I asked her to bring me her tights so I could help. As she took her sweet time getting to me, I informed her that, “I will not be late because you won’t cooperate.”
She threw her tights to me and said, “Well look at you mom! Late, coordinate, you rhymed! Haha! Late, coordinate, great. I rhymed, too.”
I put her tights on and said, “I’m leaving. Hurry up or your daddy will leave you.” It didn’t even phase her… If you ever see me and I am clearly the frazzled hot mess mom, you can assume that Vivian is involved.
I lost my Uncle this Fall, the most amazing man whose love of life was an inspiration to all. Experiencing such an unexpected and devastating loss has truly shaken me. Amid my grief, I have acquired a renewed sense of urgency and gratitude. It is a struggle, but I have decided I must share the same love of life that my Uncle Beav happily shared with everyone he encountered.
For Christmas, we gave my Aunt two beautiful pendants. One of she and my Uncle during our last visit, in front of their “lake house” and the other of them with my cousin and their daughter-in-law at their baby shower. My sweet baby cousin was born a month after the sudden loss of her Poppy, so my hope was to give Sweet P the pendant of her parents and grandparents as a keepsake.
During a round of putt-putt golf, my Uncle joked and asked me to take a picture of them in front of their lake house.
My Aunt decided to get each of my girls a pendant with a picture from our last visit. It seemed fitting to present them with their surprise on his birthday. My girls were both delighted and overcome with sadness because they simply do not understand why we lost him at the young age of 56.
When I asked the girls to think of a sweet or funny memory, my youngest, nicknamed Squeaker by my Uncle, giggled. I asked her what made her laugh and she said, “Uncle Beaver used to say ‘Kiss me dahling’ before he gave us smoochers.”
Before they went to bed, I held their faces in my hands, reminded them that Uncle Beav lives on in their hearts, and said, “kiss me dahling”, then kissed them goodnight. They blew me a kiss, patted their hand on their heart, and told me they love me with all of their hearts, just as he did at the end of our FaceTime only a few days before he suddenly passed away.
After a week of sickness, parties, church and school Christmas performances, Family visits, and the others festivities of Christmas and New Year’s Eve. I have decided that less is more. A couple of years ago we instituted a “Baby Jesus got 3 gifts and so can you” rule at Christmas.
As I have fought the uphill battle of fighting the 80’s child tendency to seek happiness in material things, I am also fighting the battle of raising 3 daughters to not be caught up in the latest and greatest trends. My 4 year old would rattle off so many things she wanted for Christmas, then not be able to tell you why she wanted the toys.
So, we decided to do only one toy this year at Christmas and the other gifts have to be something functional or an experience.
1. Santa brought a gymnastics mat & we turned their toy room into a dance studio. This is technically a gift to me and my husband as well, because it means no more acrobatics in the living room.
Christmas morning gift from Santa: a gymnastics mat, just like at the dance studio.
Ballet barres: Mama & Daddy got crafty with Lowes & Home Depot gift cards from credit card points.
2. In keeping with the minimalist trend, we gave the girls tickets to the Russian Ballet’s Swan Lake at the Fox Theater in Atlanta. An experience and memory that doesn’t clutter up our home, or cause arguments when time to clean up the toy room. Parent victory!
p.s. If you live in the Atlanta area, goto the Box Office! Had I purchased these tickets online, our family of 5 would have paid $300. Instead, we paid $155. That’s right, no Ticketmaster fees AND student pricing. Instead of $59.95, the girls’ tickets were only $15!
3. One of the hardest changes to make in trying to rock the minimalism party is instant gratification. (Think about the impulse purchases that you quickly wondered why you ever found them appealing.) So, while in Puerto Rico for Thanksgiving, we told the girls we would only sight-see, not purchase at every stop.
We came across the most adorable handmade dolls and the girls really wanted them. I told them they could think about it all day, but if they chose to get one, it would count as 1 of their 3 Christmas gifts.
By the end of the day, they still wanted the Puerto Rican dolls, despite knowing they would have to wait until Christmas morning. Patience is a virtue which does not come naturally to me, my husband, or my girls. I was thoroughly impressed!
While we are a work in progress, slowly purging our home of clutter and trying to discipline our shopping and daily life, I feel like we did well at one of the most difficult times of the year. Christmas should be a time of reflection and family, not shopping malls and perfect gift stress. Which reminds me, gift cards!
I am the Queen of Gift Cards at Christmas. Some people may say it is impersonal, but why just buy something to buy something? Instead of spending hours away from family stressing about the perfect gift, give the kids some money or a gift card and spend time with them. Think about your childhood… The best memories are probably about what you did and with whom you shared the holidays. Make the amazing memories for the next generation.
My ugly Christmas sweater busts out with the same horrible faux suede skirt every year. I know there will be times that this horrifies my daughters, but in the end, I believe we will all laugh and have fun with it. Who knows, an ugly sweater may become a right of passage in our family.
Mamarazzi & Her Divas 